Picture the scene. John Cusack is relaxing at home, chilling out with a bottle of the good stuff, watching Two and a Half Men in glorious HDTV, when an unexpected visitor descends on him to discuss matters of a delicate nature…
What Made John Cusack do Hot Tub Time Machine?*
JC: Fat Tony! What brings you to my doorstep?
Fat Tony: Well good evening Mr Cusack…
JC: John, please, call me John. We’re friends here right?
Fat Tony: Well good evening John. I’m afraid I am here on a matter of some delicacy.
JC: Tony, please, if it’s about the money…
Fat Tony: John, we have been very patient with you, but patience is wearing thin.
JC: I just need a little more time.
Fat Tony: Mr Cusack, it has not escaped our attention that you are in the movie business, right? And as far as I’m aware, the movie industry pays a very adequate wage to good looking people like yourself. People who excel at, what is it you do now? People who excel at remembering lines. It would be a shame if you were to lose those handsome features. Or, indeed, if you were no longer able to put your short term memory to such good use. That could be a hindrance for a Hollywood movie star.
JC: Tony, are you threatening me?
Fat Tony: I am just suggesting, strongly suggesting, that you pay back what you owe as soon as possible. It would be a great shame if you were to have an accident that stopped you working.
JC: But Tony, I’m just a little short at the moment. Work’s all dried up. I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but Nic Cage has got the monopoly on all the quirky guy roles.
Fat Tony: Mr Cusack, you are a Hollywood star. Am I expected to believe that you have no-one clamouring at your door?
There's a clamouring at the door.
Delivery boy: Hello Mr Cusack. Could you please sign here for this script. At least I think it’s a script. It’s very light. Maybe it’s just a treatment, huh? Mind you, it says it’s written by Josh Heald, Sean Anders and John Morris….and it doesn’t take three people to write a treatment does it?
The Hot Tub Time Machine Script has Landed
The script in question of course turns out to be the groundbreaking new film Hot Tub Time Machine. At Fat Tony’s insistence, John accepts the lead role, agreeing to play a loser called Adam. The film will at least pay enough money to get Tony off his back, he thinks, and hopefully it will slide into complete and utter obscurity. Job done.
Sadly, with the Hollywood star John Cusack on board, Hot Tub Time Machine quickly begins to suffer delusions of grandeur. The film starts to get talked up in all the right circles. People think it’s gonna be a hit! In an homage to Back to the Future, they actually manage to get Marty Mcfly’s dad himself Crispin Glover to come on board. Then iconic 80s star Chevy Chase agrees to play the hot tub repairman. As an added bonus, Cusack manages to get lovely Lizzy Caplan to play his girlfriend too. Maybe this film isn’t going to be the disaster he thought it was?
Except of course it is. Totally. Hot Tub Time Machine is one of those so bad it’s good films. Only, it already knows it. Which sort of cancels it out. Setting out to make a film that’s so bad it’s good does somewhat defeat the object. That said, the film does have some funny lines. Well, one funny line anyway. About a hot tub. That’s also a time machine. Amazing!
Hot Tub Time Machine - What’s the Plot?
The plot, such that it is, consists of three down-on their luck pals who set out to cheer themselves up with a visit to an old drinking haunt - a hotel - from their eighties heydays. Whilst getting trashed in the hot tub, a crazy Russian energy drink (called Chernobyly, nice touch) gets spilled all over the control panel. This results in an effect that, let’s face it, the title has already given away. Is any further explanation required? Of course not.
Whisked back to their youth, the three pals Adam (John Cusack), Nick (Craig Robinson) and Lou (Rob Corddry), along with Adam’s nerdy young nephew Jacob (Clark Duke), are faced with a dilemma. To get back to their sorry lives in the future, do they have to play things the same as they did first time around, or should they risk changing the timeline continuuam by doing things a little differently? Obviously, it’s quite a brain teaser. What will they do? You’ll never guess!
One of Those Great Films for a Cosy Night In
Whilst the premise of Hot Tub Time Machine is clearly preposterous, it’s played completely straight by a talented cast, who are all clearly all up for a laugh. It might not be in contention come Oscar night, but it’s executed pretty well. Yes it’s a shocker, but it’s a shocker with an absolute purpose. And that purpose is to watch it with your mates whilst you’re all getting drunk. It is the perfect background movie for a big night in. Just don’t watch it alone, ‘cause that wouldn’t be any fun at all. Oh, and make sure you’ve got plenty of booze in the house too. Now if you actually happen to have a hot tub, whoa! Full effect!
- Hot Tub Time Machine
- Directed by: Steve Pink
- Written by: Josh Heald, Sean Anders, John Morris
- Starring: John Cusack, Rob Corddry, Craig Robinson, Clark Duke,
- Running Time: 101 mins
- Year of Release: 2010
* Please note, all of the conversations above pertaining to the Hollywood star Mr John Cusack owing debts of any kind to shady, mobster characters are ENTIRELY FICTITIOUS. They come from the deluded mind of a world weary film critic, who actually quite likes you John, and has concocted the above scenario merely to assure herself that there could, perhaps, be a very good reason for career anomalies like Identity, Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil and Hot Tub Time Machine. Okay, I suppose most critics do actually quite like Midnight, and if I’m absolutely honest I doubt I would have turned down a film called Hot Tub Time Machine myself either, but really, John, how long must we wait for the next Grosse Pointe Blank or Being John Malkovich? How long???
Michelle Strozykowski - Michelle Strozykowski lives in a small brewing town smack bang in the middle of England. She loves films, especially arty European ones ...
